I have unsettled business. It is my music. This is what I set out to do years ago. I need to focus on that first and for most. This is what has always driven me, and I am ready to give myself back to it.
A few years ago I hit a wall. I came out of an engagement that I had wanted for most of my adult life. The woman was the one that always left me wondering, "what if?". The long and short of it is that I found out "what if", and it sucked. It left me confused and without direction. In an attempt to regain some direction and focus I turned toward the discipline of triathlon. I developed a multi year plan aimed at completing an Ironman.
The goals I set were accomplished methodically. I finished 2 ironman distance races, 7 70.3 distance races, and 5 stand alone marathons. I relied on the consistency of my training and was always willing to make sacrifices to achieve my goals.
I need to apply the same energy toward my music. I still hope to run a 50k this fall, but I can not see my self commiting to a 50 mile race and being able to give music the attention I need to. I need to be in a place where I can feel ok with missing or skipping a workout or two. Music is my greatest passion . I need to set my musical goals higher then those in sport right now.
The personal healing I looked for has occured and I want to be able to go deeper on an emotional level. I wasn't willing to do that before and my music suffered for it. I am ready now.
No comments:
Post a Comment